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Holiday Gift Giving Guide for Guys

“Opportunity knocks for every man, but you have to give a woman a ring.”
~Mae West~

Gentlemen, I feel your pain. I really do. Nobody will know you’ve been here. Your gift-giving insecurity secret is safe with me.

After careful consultation with the wonderful world of women, I give you the benefit of this almost-evidence based research freely, and from my heart.

Go forth with #1 and a few of the other suggestions to take you from out in the cold and into the soft bosom of the fabulous woman who has captured your heart.

1) Do your shopping now. You know, just in case…November is statistically the most likely month for a break-up, so be wise and keep your woman OR keep the receipt. Better yet, make some single woman’s month and ask her out on a date to go skating or look at the Christmas lights.

2) Nice women don’t ask for specific gifts. If a woman has you going mad to find just the right thing and will have a fit if you don’t find it, do yourself a favour and dump her. Get a nice girl who cherishes time with you, not a material score.

3) Jewelry. You really can’t go wrong. By the way, watches are not jewelry. Pearls and opals are not appropriate for a man to give a woman. Pearls bring tears and opals crack. Jewelry is a symbol of your affection. Your affection should not make a woman cry, or waver/crack. Buy the precious stones just to be sure…rubies, sapphires, diamonds or emeralds.

4) The gift doesn’t matter as much as the moment. Plan time with your woman before she has to ask. That means more than any gift.

5) Wrap it yourself. We think it’s cute.

6) Buy a card. A sappy one. Better yet, write your own. Pour your heart out. We will read it and re-read it. It’s the gift that keeps on giving.

7) Consult her friends. We share a strong sisterhood. If you care enough to ‘get the nod’ from the girls, we know that not only do you care for us, but you’re brave. Courage is sexy.

8) Pay attention. Does she buy her girly gitch at a boutique or Sears? Where does she go to the spa? Buy her gift cards for HER favourite spots.

9) Lingerie. Don’t. Just don’t even try. Gift cards. Generous gift cards. Women who choose their lingerie (with your taste in mind of course) will feel sexy in something that they choose. Garters and stockings? Something in leather? Give us the card, and we will find something that makes us feel hot, and that my dear man-friend is guaranteed to make you hot over and over and over.

10) The twelve days of Christmas. We love romance. Do something wonderful every day. A note, a hidden gift, a special toast by the Christmas tree before bedtime, a list of things you want to do together, a list of the things that you adore, a sweet treat….you get the picture.

Remember. We love you to bits. You are our best friend and the man who makes us feel like we’re home when we’re in your arms. Diamonds? Maybe. Thoughtfulness – that’s the best gift of all.