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Teenage Head vs. Buddha

be here nowMy sweetie and I are not of the same vintage. We often find ourselves WTF’ing about our friends’ antics, and our choices of entertainment .Yet we persevere, giggle, and learn A LOT.

It was this past weekend at a Teenage Head concert that most of my Buddhist training came back to me. Present moment? Pul-eaze, these folks were hanging on to the past harder than me hanging on to my only child’s innocence.

The present moment was nowhere to be found. Hanging on to beer bottles like the social-teddy-bear-comfort-of-underage-drinkers, fifty and sixty-somethings duded themselves up in outfits that should never, ever, be seen in public. Ever.

Were they having fun, or out there hoping to have the same kind of fun that they organically experienced in their youth? It’s a spiderweb issue, never really to be dissected.

I’ve had the good fortune of being exposed to trauma and crisis. Yes, I did say good fortune. I say that because I’ve witnessed true grace under presssure. Whatever the age or stage, it takes grace to transition to another phase with success and with some modicum of fabulousness.

Which brings me to the crux of what I’ve been thinking about lately; how to remain happy in the present moment, and continue to be spontaneous even as fear disguises itself as good sense and responsibility.

It’s tough. “We get cautious“, my gal-pal said to me during a conversation about how we’re feeling ‘old’.  Just yesterday I was stretched out in a worn blue gown that ties at the back on the pale green sheets of a gurney, being told about parts of my internal organs that were not healthy.

edith-piaf-non-je-ne-regrette-rien-columbia-8I regret nothing; The crazy nights out, my falling in and out of love,  career changes, my devotion to my kiddo, and especially my larger-than-life-sometimes-too-much-for-you personality.

What I do regret though is the caution that has gotten comfy and is taking up space in my psyche.

So, I hope to find joy in new places, experiences and acquaintances, that maybe, just maybe will scare me a little bit.

I beg of you. Let the 80’s hair, leather and old artists go. rade it in for the some half-shaved version  of the now, more sassy leather, and support new artisits. Find something new and fresh. Live in the present moment. Allow your body and your soul to mellow and change. Rejoice in your softening.Read new authors, go see new plays, listen to live music written and performed by kids who could be your own, paint your living room red, learn to code….

Whatever you do, do it with all of your heart, and laugh. Laugh a lot.




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How to Get Up & Get Going For Fall

The older I get, the easier it is to make up excuses not to do stuff.

It’s easy to come home, go through the motions and then fake like a boob and get stuck on the chesterfield all night.

It was thanks only to my genius Summer-To-Do list that I accomplished anything fun this summer. You see, my summer turned into a bit of a gong-show, thanks to my self-indulgent je-ne-care-pas, and a schedule only five-star anal-retentive could memorize.

I managed to accomplish all but one of the fun-things on my list. I’m ok with that though. It’ll give me a starting point for my 2016-Summer-To-Do-List.

So, with the proven success of making a list of fun stuff to do,(spontaneity is best, but what the hell, I’m Type A) I am going to formulate an Autumn To-Do List. This will not include anything that I don’t want to do, like finish most of my Christmas shopping, grout cleaning or dragging out our winter clothing.

1) Host our annual Friends’ Thanksgiving Dinner


2) Spending a day at one, or a number of, our local Niagara Winerieswinetour

3) Purchasing 12 bottles of wine directly from said wineries


4) Hallowe’en Hay Ride, corn maze, or some such shenanigan…

corn maze

5) Road trip with someone who makes me laugh


6) Smores in the fireplace


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Holiday Flirting Season Kick-Off

redDear Gal-Pals,

Let it be known that I still have that Irish Fire I was known for in my youth.

Although there are men who never learn their lesson, I still believe there are good, fun, and very wonderful men out there, regardless of how poor my judgement, my grand naiveté, or my bubbly fuelled fairytale fantasies.

Ok, maybe the good ones are scarce, but the fun ones are a’plenty, and that’s all a girl really needs.

Let the games begin, and may the best,( very best ) man win…

Giddy-up and happy holidays!


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…and Then There Are Days Like This

8658-573x761There are days that find us blissfully removed from worldly stresses and concerns.

There are days when our own little world and everything in it reeks of lollipops and sunshine and big, ole’ rainbows…

…and then there are days like today..

At exactly 3:21 p.m. I made the conscious and very executive decision that I must soon schedule a serious adults-only time-out. I made a mental list in my head of everything I would need;

1) Champagne

2) Man

Yep, just a two item list to sweep me from, “this cannot seriously be what life is all about” to “oh sweet love of all that’s holy, life and everything in it is goo-oo-ood!“.

In less than 24 hours I will officially be over-the-hump-of-the-famed-busy-time-of-year, and into a my favourite, hibernate in my office mode where I can set my OCD loose on organizing everything and ticking items off of my long, and ever growing to-do list.

So bring on the next 24 hours, and then get outta the way because I have some very serious, very champagne-soaked- and-possibly-naked relaxing to do.

Applications now being accepted for item 2 on the list. Only those candidates with the desired qualifications will be called for an audition.

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2014: The List

"It's kind of fun to do the impossible."  ~Walt Disney~
“It’s kind of fun to do the impossible.”
~Walt Disney~

Last year I had a total of three items on my 2013 To-Do-List.

Two of them were within my control, and I’ve checked those off. The third….let’s just say it’s a little more…it’s going to have to be an addendum to the 2014 list.

So far there are two items on my 2014 list, and the 2013 addendum of course. But I’m working on that one, making an effort to keep my mind and heart open to all possibilities.

Of the two items on the 2014 list, I will share only one of them with you my darlings. That’s right, it’s a lady’s prerogative to keep some things to herself and herself alone.

The number one item on my 2014 To-Do-List is to……(drum rolllllllll please!)….FUN.

Yes, this year I’m going to have more fun.

Yep. I know, I know. It seems like my life is one day of sunshine and rainbows after the next, but that’s not the case. 2013 saw its fair share of hard work, worries, and sleepless nights.

With a list of just two things and an addendum, I think I can manage a little more fun.

I’m not just talking about your run of the mill, go-to-the-fair-sing-at-the-top-of-your-lungs-in-the-shower kind of fun.

I’m talking about making the most of every moment and enjoying it. Having more fun at work, with my kiddo, while I tidy the house, and as I make my way through traffic every weekday morning. Now that will be a challenge.

I suppose the more intellectual folks our there may call it mindfulness, being in the moment or some such sophisticated spiritual way of being. I’m just going to call it “fun”.

This may take some later nights, a case of bubbles, and a sprucing up of my business suit inspired wardrobe, but I’m willing to do the work. Besides that darlings, laughter is sexy.

What’s on your list?




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Rules of Engagement

Elite Dinner Party!
Elite Dinner Party! (Photo credit:

Years ago I was invited to a very purposeful dinner party. It was a monthly event hosted by a core group of single friends looking for a partner. 

The key to the success of the event was that everyone committed to  participation. The catch was that you had to convince one new single person of the same-sex to attend the party with you.

Each month, the members of the group were introduced to friends of friends, thereby expanding social circles and increasing exposure to potential partners.

I never attended these dinner parties despite multiple invitations. You see, I’m just not that kind of girl. Stifled polite conversation doesn’t get to the heart of who someone is, it merely let’s you know whether a gentleman knows which utensils and plates to use.

If I were to host such parties ( and I just may decide to do this), I would have other rules.


Rules of Engagement

1) Everyone must cook a dish to bring to the party, include the recipe,and make up a story about how the recipe came to be. Extra attraction points go to rom/com stories in line with the theme of the evening.

2) Everyone would have to take off their shoes and socks at the door. Nothing says ‘be fore-warned about all of my bad stuff’ like the ugliness of someone’s feet. This way, the ice is broken, we’ve seen some of  your ugly bits.

3) All guests would have to join hands and sing/learn the Johnny Appleseed prayer. Any man who is brave enough to sing Johnny Appleseed is truly a man.

4)There would be a bowl of discussion topics in the centre of the table to be passed around. Each diner would have to speak for two minutes. Subjects could include; my morning bathroom routine, favourite every-day getaways, reasons I may not want to be romantic, what part of my body makes me uniquely sexy.

5)A two drink limit. You must have two drinks to loosen up prior to your speech. Wine is a truth serum. If you don’t/can’t consume alcohol, I’ll sneak you half a Valium just to get you loosened up.

6) Proper, boy, girl, boy, girl seating to ensure a good mix.

7) A confession segment. The ‘guests’ would have to confess one thing they’re envious of, about the person who invited them.

8) Mandatory phone list and confidentiality agreement. To ensure that all diners and guests are sincere in their efforts to work toward the goal of the group, attendees must provide their contact information (phone number) to the host in advance. A list will be provided to every guest at the end of the evening. The numbers must be held in confidence and not shared outside of the group.

9) Each guest must participate in all events, including the games section. One of the following games would take place following the meal; Pictionary, Charades, Name That Tune (byok – bring your own kazoo).

10)  Invited guests interested in joining the ‘group’ could do so after buying the executive committee (myself and anyone else interested in a governance position) a bottle of Spanish Cava and a Dairy Milk bar.