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The Good Guys vs. The Bad Guys

good-vs-badI love the good guys.

You know darlings, the wonderful ones who are thoughtful, intelligent, and have given some consideration to how they show up in the world every day.

Not the ones who are inconsistent, emotional deserts, or live by the ‘boys will be boys’ philosophy of irresponsibility.

I suppose it’s the same for anyone, heterosexual, homosexual, or any-sexual at all. If you’re thoughtful, intelligent and have given some consideration to how you show up in the world every day, then you’re at least a 7.

Not that I typically rate my potential mates on a scale of one to ten, but I had to give it some perspective.

Good guys always win. No matter the heartbreak, the emotional teeter-tottering, or bullshit dished up by some men, there are always more who are wonderful, and, well, wonderful.

The lyrics to Adam Cohen’s Like a Man describe the good guys, the ones we find only after test-driving the same type of emotionally stagnant bad-boys until we’ve learned our lesson.

Good guys sometimes come about just because they’re awesome, and others by fire.

Whatever the case, we send mixed signals to these men. On one hand, we tell them  that they must be tough and macho to be sexy, and on the other, they have to be open-hearted and loving too.

Women aren’t the only ones held to an impossible standard.

This is for the good guys out there. The ones who;

…have called me every single Christmas day without fail even though we’ve only seen each other once during the past 7 years

…make sure my kid gets to the home opener when I can’t do that for him.

… have taken me out to dinner on the nights I’ve been stood up

…have held me while I cried, and not tried to shag me even though I was vulnerable

…have called me on my bullshit and made me accountable

… offered to shake up the guy who just broke my heart or hassled me at the office

…fix my car without charging me

…have taken me on real dates, and given me thoughtful gifts.

…taught my son ‘guy stuff’ that I couldn’t teach him

…know when to call and say hello, and just check in

…shared their heart with me

There are a lot of great guys you there, you just have to be a great woman to find your equal.

Oh, and one more thing…

…you must be patient, very, very, patient.




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Girls These Days

I think Adam Cohen captures our hearts with this song, Girls These Days on his album Like a Man.  Even though he refers to us wonderfully sensual women as ‘girls’, he gets my vote. After all, doesn’t a real man make you feel like a girl again?

Girls These Days

by:Adam Cohen

Girls these days, they wanna come first
To know who they are, to know what they’re worth.
They wanna have nights where everything works,
Keep it light, nobody gets hurt.
They wanna smile when they press rewind,
They don’t want life to pass them by,
They wanna feel, they wanna touch,
Girls these days, they want so much.
They’ll fool you into thinkin’ that you’re gonna drive,
Then you’ll be looking over from the passenger’s side,
Girls these days.
Girls these days.

Girls these days, they wanna control,
When they say stop, wait, go.
They put your number in and leave you wonderin’ if it’s yes or no.
What they got is so good you’ll be runnin’ red lights.
It could be jackpot if you play your hand right.
Girls these days.
Girls these days.

These days they’ll tell you what their name is
These days they’ll walk right up to strangers
Girls these days.
Girls these days are beautiful…
And guys like me are barely keepin’ up
Guys like me are still fallin’ in love
With these girls, these girls, these girls, these girls, these days
Girls these days.
Girls these days.

Show you their intimate pages
Take you private place
Show you their intimate pages
Take you private place

He’s right, we do want to smile when we press rewind. Consider it a great tip from a lady’s man who was trained by the best.  Be the kind of man we want to rewind to again and again.