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To All of You Miserable SOB’s

miserable bastardListen up for a sweet minute, all you eye-rolling-smugger-than-thou-would-be-hipsters-if-you-weren’t-too-freaking-old; over-use of sarcasm just makes you annoying and irrelevant. Which will eventually lead to you sitting down to a big ole’ thirteen course meal of humble pie. In public.

Unless you have something fun and constructive to add to any conversation with generally contented peers, you may want to consider shutting the hell up. There is little more debilitating to your general attractiveness as a human being, than being a social rain cloud.

As a young woman, I thought I could change the world via the inevitable truth in journalism, protests, and heated conversations at social gatherings.  I am convinced now that I was wrong.

Change happens slowly, like the relentlessly gentle passage of water which eventually cuts clean through rock.

Sarcasm never wins the day, especially if that is the only weapon in your tiny arsenal of wit – Because you are annoying.  And although most people will either pitch their tent within two camps; camp silent resentment or camp rage out loud, your miserable SOB comments will eventually stir waters that run very deeply.   At that point prepare to be just as publicly embarrassed by your underdeveloped personality as you try to embarrass everyone else.

 

 

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