Deep purple. The Pink Panther. Randall.
You know what I”m talking about ladies – your BOB’s.
For those of you not in the 90’s know, BOB is a dirty acronym. Battery. Operated. Boyfriend.
If you deny having one, either you’re missing out, or you’re lying.
Recently I had the occasion to invite another BOB into my life. Not because I was jonesing for a new part-time lover, but for other personal reasons. And we shall leave it at that.
At mid-life sexuality is interesting. Just like everything else; our careers, our relationships, and our perspective on how-in-the-hell-did-we-end-up-here.
At this stage, when it comes to sex you’ve either giddy-uped, gotten-down and satisfied your every whim, or you’re spent shell of a person wondering how you missed out on it all. At this age, whether you really ever need to see anyone else your age naked is a question you start to consider seriously.
Naked and sex are often poor substitutes for sensuality, when really, they are the pleasurable end-result.
Sensuality is Marc Broussard singing Do Right Woman.
You may think that BOB is going to make you feel sexual. For a while, and for a purpose, but more than BOB, you need to remember how to make love to yourself.
Too often the synchronicity of making time for our significant others feels like another obligation, rather than the joy of connection that it should be. Sensuality gets discouraged, because after all, wouldn’t it be nice to always end a hot bath or beautiful snack with some lovemaking? Alas, we are too often left alone feeling like a cog in a relationship wheel, unappreciated as a sensual being.
This is where your imagination comes in. Start with BOB if you must, but try to remember what it’s like to soak in a luxurious bath surrounded by the scents that make you exhale…orange blossom, vanilla, cinnamon. You need to remember how good it feels to pass the razor over your tired legs, and to massage your favourite shampoo into your scalp.
Perhaps like me, you enjoy the cool, salty sensation of fresh oysters and creamy champagne, or a pungent blue cheese accompanied with port by candlelight on a crisp fall evening.
BOB may help you remember the end game, but it won’t love you the way you can love you baby.
Indulge in the sensual sights, smells and sensations that remind your body of just how sexy it is. Trust me, someone will notice.