Last night my partner informed me that you catch more flies with honey than sugar. I informed him that the time for honey had passed.
I was advocating for my friend’s health care. My friends are my family, and I protect people I love with passion and ferocity when need be. When a man does this he is seen as being a provider and a protector. When a woman does this she’s a bitch, or, as one privileged male recently was quoted as saying; she’s a “nasty woman”.
Sometimes being a nasty woman is the only way to go in world dominated by a masculine norm.
Women who are intelligent and assertive have to be way more careful about how and what they say in every situation other than a wine-and-yoga-pants night with the girls. Take the recent defeat of Hillary Clinton in her bid to be president of the U.S.A. A woman with experience was vilified more than a misogynist, narcissistic business man who has robbed the nation of millions (if not billions) of dollars by way of evading taxes. But I digress…
We know when it’s time for the vinegar, and most importantly, we think it’s hilarious to watch your gobsmacked reaction to good sense, boundaries and intelligence. Those of us who identify as being anything but masculine are forced to function within the norms of a society based on the concept that male dominance and strength are the only values that everyone should aspire to. Our economy, education and news media are all based on this basic foundation of patriarchy.
Look at Hillary’s pant suits for goodness sake. Do we really have to dress like men to be taken seriously? I don’t give a flying fuck if you’re wearing a chiffon tutu and a smocked blouse, I will respect you if you know what you’re talking about. I will respect you more if you stand up for your rights, have boundaries, and can laugh at it all at the end of the day.
In the midst of my stern advocacy last night, any woman would have had a grin on her face. My mumster laughed this morning when she checked in to see how my pal was doing, sure in her knowledge that I would be successful in getting the care that was necessary.
When my ill pal finally met with her health care provider, she texted me; “Lol! I assumed that was you on the phone.”, I knew that not only would her health care improve, but she would get a chuckle out of it all too.
Being a bitch, nasty woman, or f’ing c@&t are all words that strong, independent women hear every day when it comes to expecting the same respect and treatment as men. Keeping your sense of humour about it is essential.
When a woman pulls someone up on the rug, it’s only because the ‘honey’ that we’re conditioned to communicate with has been denied again.
Be courageous ladies. We need to care for one another. Above all else, keep laughing in the face of those who don’t understand how wonderful nasty women are.