I used to think the term partner was kind of dorky. It was a pretentious term that made me want to gag. Kind of like when someone said, ‘making love’. What the hell?!
Partnership and making love seem to have gotten a lot more sexy as I’ve gotten a lot more mature.
The older we get, the more important it is to connect with someone who understands the values you were raised with and where you come from.
I recently connected with a school chum who has known me since I was a pre-teen. We spent some time talking and shared a male/female perspective on life, work, and partnership.
Ah, yes. Partnership. The great connection we all seek which satiates the need to have someone witness our lives. Time unravels more quickly as we get closer to the end, and having someone to partner with begins to mean more and more.
Having a partner means having someone to stand as our witness in this world and say,
I see you. I see you for who you are, all you’ve been through and accomplished, and everything you hope to be. I see you.
True partnership is rare. Partnerships involve intertwining two lives to support, uplift and encourage one another. And that comes with the requirement to empathize and love in an active way. It requires truly caring for someone and putting your kind thoughts and words into action.
You go out the door everyday cheering one another on, and come back together eager to share and plan. If it’s working, both benefit. If it’s not, you feel like you’re not in partnership, but continuing a solo journey through this wild and wonderful blink-of-an-eye that we call life.
True partnership is a dance of communication, support and joyfully participating in not only the exciting, but the mundane aspects of one another’s life. Ah yes, the mundane. That unsexy, but major part of our time spent here on earth.
Our culture honours the individual and often people dismiss commitment, thinking that relationship growth will come without effort or deliberate attention. Good luck with that.
Partnerships are living relationships. Nurturing a culture of neglect within a relationship is a bad thing. You know what happens when you neglect living things? They die.
People want partnership but they aren’t willing to do the work. They aren’t willing to communicate, prioritize time and sadly, many people lack empathy. We swing our relationships in stomach-churning circles, instead of lovingly holding them with care and giving them the elements they need to survive.
Tonight it was nice to connect with someone who really understands what it means to be in partnership.
It was nice to know that my values and my heart are not alone in this world, and that someone, somewhere remembers who we were.