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The Amazing C Strikes Again

"Talking to an old friend makes you realize just how much your life has changed and how much your dreams have remained the same."
“Talking to an old friend makes you realize just how much your life has changed and how much your dreams have remained the same.”

I need a girl talk and The Amazing C can’t talk. Get your vagina out, ” I said as I inched my way through traffic.

If I could do that, I’d be in front of the mirror. Seriously. Can you hold on? I have to get in my hammock and need to switch phones.”

That was my alternate  gal-pal. As you might have guessed he’s sans girly-bits, but one of my very best-of-all-time friends. He’s my surrogate girlfriend and I love him like no other man.

It has been an eternity since The Amazing C and I have had a chance for a long, giggly girl-talk like we used to have. I do have the Delightful D who has earned an honoured place in the fairytale of  Andshelaughsland, and I don’t know what I’d do without her. The Lovely L has been in my life for over 25 years, and I couldn’t be without her either.

Having said that, The Amazing C is the only, I mean ONLY, pal who can appreciate the things that I have to talk about right now. The reason is that she is the only gal-pal who worked in the same, mythologized industry as me, and knows about the unique stress and satisfaction of the calling.

My oldest friends are all busy with their hubbies and children, while I remain, the sole single gal on the scene, doggedly working at her career.

Which, incidentally my darlings, has paid off, as I haven’t been this fulfilled at work since, well, since I was young and naïve.

Despite lack of doting, hunk-a-hunk-a-burning-I-love-you-so-much-I-can’t-possibly-make-enough-love-to-you in my life, I’m still satisfied. More importantly I’m old enough to appreciate that this isn’t happening at the same time as my intense relationship with work.

Despite texting, and trying unsuccessfully to connect via phone (we live 729 km apart), The Amazing C and I can’t seem to get it together. Either I’m working, or….well, working or she’s momming.

So today, when I tried to eek out some girl-time on my way home, she said, “Can’t talk now. At GT Boutique”. I wasn’t surprised, but I was disappointed. Again. The let-down goes both way with us, but we continue to make it work.

“Ok, bye. Luv ya.”

“Luv ya back”….click.

Le -girl-sigh.

BUT….The Amazing C called back because she knew I needed to talk to her and only her.  We talked for less than 10 minutes. I heard about her crisis at work, and she heard about my ‘holy-crapoli’ revelation. When you have such a good friend for such a long time, sometimes that’s all you need.

 

 

 

 

 

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Thought of the Day

circus

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Weekend Enlightenment

"There are three possible parts to a date, of which at least two must be offered: entertainment, food, and affection. It is customary to begin a series of dates with a great deal of entertainment, a moderate amount of food, and the merest suggestion of affection. As the amount of affection increases, the entertainment can be reduced proportionately. When the affection is the entertainment, we no longer call it dating. Under no circumstances can the food be omitted." ~Miss Manners' Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behaviour~
“There are three possible parts to a date, of which at least two must be offered: entertainment, food, and affection. It is customary to begin a series of dates with a great deal of entertainment, a moderate amount of food, and the merest suggestion of affection. As the amount of affection increases, the entertainment can be reduced proportionately. When the affection is the entertainment, we no longer call it dating. Under no circumstances can the food be omitted.”
~Miss Manners’ Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behaviour~

Things I learned this Weekend;

1) I’d rather drive around in my little compact car that I worked hard to pay for, than have to make love to a wrinkled old pervert who drives a Mazerati. Yes, even if it’s a convertible, and even if he’s a good-looking man for his age.

2) Being the submissive one in a relationship is sometimes deeply satisfying.

3) Forno Cultura remains the single-best bakery in the GTA. I will take my Sunday coffee beside the lake with one of their biscotti with grappa soaked currents. Thank you Forno Cultura for teaching me about taste-bud orgasm.  Miss Manners said it best….

4) Latin jazz can make a cool summer day sizzle, and, I’ve been too long without a holiday. Jazz 91.1 makes it simple on Saturdays…check it out!

5) Really, really great sex is totally worth having to do the laundry.

6) Only other artists can inspire you to lose the anxiety that insecurity smothers us with.

7) Bathing suits for women with large breasts should be designed by structural  engineers and styled by Victoria’s Secret. If you find a combination of the two in a suit, buy it regardless of cost. The best place locally (by far!!!) is Susan’s Lingerie.

8) Consciously honouring your spirit should be done on a regular basis. God bless Wonderworks.  They are having an open house next weekend, and if your spirit, creative self, or worn out shell-of-a-self needs some lovin’, that’s where you’ll get what you need.

9) I still don’t understand men, and I suck at communicating anything remotely romantic. Our heads and hearts often disagree, but we need both of them to lead a rich, fulfilling life.

10) Ode on a Grecian Urn remains my favourite poem, despite having first read it over 20 years ago. It explains our human condition so well. If you want to know more about what I’m speaking of; Why We Can’t Get No Satisfaction

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Why We Can’t Get No Satisfaction

"...Fair youth beneath the trees, thou canst not leave Thy song, nor ever can those tress be bare; Bold lover, never, never canst thou kiss, Though winning near the goal - yet , do not grieve; She cannot fade, though thou has not thy bliss, For ever wilt though love, and she be fair!" ~ John Keats~
“…Fair youth beneath the trees, thou canst not leave
Thy song, nor ever can those tress be bare; Bold lover, never, never canst thou kiss, Though winning near the goal – yet , do not grieve; She cannot fade, though thou has not thy bliss, For ever wilt though love, and she be fair!”
~ John Keats~

Some people think that it’s the tension of being left wanting  that makes the artist, the writer, the musician.

Sometimes the beauty of the human spirit expressed through art shines the brightest in the darkest of situations, where want and need constantly lurk behind the corners of our comfort.

Contentment and satisfaction are often short-lived, a tension always pulling at our attention, our ability to focus, and our ability to be at ease with less.

So it is with art, the same as with our lovers.  “Are you tired?”. My head was tilted back, my vulnerable neck left exposed, and my eyes were closed. I felt nothing of hunger, or cold or wanting. “I’m content. Sated.”

I like that,” he said, reclining back on his elbow.

Sated. That’s an evocative word isn’t it?  It’s so much better than happy, ok, or even relaxed.  Sated, it whispers hints of sloth after completely satisfying the deep hunger of lustful  greed and gluttony.

Being satiated rarely leads to ground breaking creativity. It usually just leads to deep, restful sleep.

So why is it, that with our partners we always want more? What’s wrong with a partner who completes you intellectually, another spiritually, and another sexually? Why can’t we just let go of the faults, the tension, the wanting the impossible of knowing someone completely when we never really ever know ourselves? Why do we always want more?

The beauty of all of these relationships; the spiritual, the intellectual and the physical is that they stand incomplete against the measuring stick of perfection. I believe that the beauty in relationships is much like art; the sublime shines brightest against the darkness of lack.

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A Quieted Mind

rest your mindThis morning I woke completely relaxed and unfettered by worries about what was on my to-do list.

I know exactly what I need to help shake off the skin of every-day-working-and-doing-it-all, and yesterday I got exactly what I needed.

Yesterday  it was tequila in the form of margaritas (slurpies for adults), and the resulting shenanigans that helped me unwind from my ever busy self.

Lately I’ve been busier than I have in a long time. I’ve neglected my Creative Self, and it’s starting to pull at my conscience. It’s little voice is whispering, “I’m still here, and I’m not going anywhere until you feed me“.

Thank you Creative Self for being so insistent and relentless in your will to survive. I need you.

When my mind is quiet, when I wake relaxed, and take my morning coffee on the patio in the still morning, that is when I hear my heart whisper. That is when my intuition finds its footing, and gathers strength.

I am a woman who fully trusts her intuition, and nurtures her creative spirit, even if it takes a little misbehaving and fermented agave a la frozen concoction maker.

Looking forward to the celebrations that will mark my 40th birthday, I’ve decided to listen to the whispers of my heart, and snuggle up with what makes me happy.

My wish for you on this Sunday, and every day, is that you find some quiet time to listen for those beautifully, bittersweet murmurs of your heart.  I hope that you hear what they tell you, and aren’t afraid to act on them.

If you need some courage, may I suggest  a little bit of  tequila and some Jimmy Buffett….