Men & Meat; Chicks Shouldn’t BBQ

English: Fresh cut meat for Korean BBQ Categor...

English: Fresh cut meat for Korean BBQ Category:Korean cuisine (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Women love looking after their man.

You can tell how great a man is to his partner by how well he’s taken care of.

When my friends and I are in relationship bliss with our significant others, we cook for them, buy them little gifties, let them have all the man-cave time they want and think it’s cute, sexy even.

When a man looks after his woman, she gives it back in multiples. Pun absolutely intended.

Cooking becomes more than making sure he eats, it’s a pleasure watching him enjoy his food. His nodding off while lounging at home in the evening is so sweet.  When a man is gentle with his woman, everything is bliss.

…and then there’s reality… 

I think that’s why we have raw meat and flames.   When a man’s manliness gets in the way of relating – he doesn’t listen, he’s insensitive or his head is generally hidden up his butt, there’s always the BBQ; A man’s reliable weapon during the battle of the sexes.

I’m getting ahead of myself though. You perhaps need a refresher regarding the definition of  Man-Dumb. You know what I’m talking about when I say “man-dumb” don’t you ladies? I mean MAN DUMB. As in, you could tell him eight bazillion ways about how you feel and he still wouldn’t get it and doesn’t seem to care to get it- that’s MAN DUMB.

Pointing out how you could have done everything better – cut your hair, baked cookies, spoken to your boss – and then get defensive saying he’s just trying to help – that’s MAN DUMB.

We don’t want you to fix things boys, we want you to wrap your big strapping arms around us and say it’s ok. We want you, as well-groomed and smelling pretty as you very well may be, to be our Manosaurusrex. Anything else at the pinnacle of girl-crisis is MAN-DUMB.  We have our girlfriends for strategy. That’s who we commune with in the war-room of life. We need you for moral support and unconditional adoration.

You, my strapping piece of man-sausage are our rock and knight in shining armor.

So, back to the barbecue. Meat and flames….what gives?

Well, I think when the battle of the sexes has reached a long, cool, stalemate, the last bastion of hope is the grill. There’s something very sexy, primitive even, about a man feeding a woman. It’s like he went out and slayed the big scary  beast and is protecting his woman.  Sorta.

Maybe that’s just the gin and tonic talking sweetheart.  A man at the barbecue  when we’re delusional post-period, can melt our cold little hearts.  The barbecue can turn a man who apparently either can’t hear, read non-verbal cues, or appreciate that he’s in a relationship with a woman, (not his mother) into a sex god.

It doesn’t matter how MAN DUMB your man has been.  If you see him out there, grilling, over a red-hot flame – you can’t help but be turned on a little bit. I mean, can you?  Just think of it, Mr. Sexy-I’ve-worked-hard-all-day-but-I’m-still-takin’-care-of-my-baby…..give him a break ladies.

So, Chicks Shouldn’t BBQ. We should meditate on the meat, er, I mean testosterone standing out there on the deck, and smile knowing what we get for dessert. After all ladies, we all know that summer is the best time for shakin’ up the bacon that the Manosaurusrex brought home.

Have BBQ – auditioning for guest chefs…

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3 thoughts on “Men & Meat; Chicks Shouldn’t BBQ

  1. This post is even more fabulous than your usual absolutely fabulous ones! Maybe it’s all that talk of meat…

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