The “C” Word

Showy Lady Slippers

Showy Lady Slippers (Photo credit: Odalaigh)

No, not that one. For my readers who really know me, it’s not the Amazing “C” either (sorry pumpkin).

The ‘C’ word is “Commitment”.

That word has been known to make me shiver, lose consciousness and even forget my manners.

A number of less than kind readers have reflected on my aversion to having a committed relationship. I say; do not judge lest ye be judged. I figure getting quasi-biblical might speak to any archaic idea about how a woman should live.

To be perfectly clear, I am not averse to a committed relationship. I am averse to being in any relationship just for the sake of having a bed-warmer October through April or for a second income. Believe you me my precious little diamonds-of-love, being a single woman has forced me to closely analyze my relationships status and resulting quality of life.

My conclusion? I’d rather be dirt poor and happy than trapped in a home where I am not. I’d rather be the poster woman for Ella’s, ‘The Lady is a Tramp’, than not be able to stand on my own two feet and look after myself.

Caveat; I am not alone. I have a plethora of loving, giving, strong, intelligent friends (both men and women, so don’t accuse me of being a man-hater either my judgmental little prunes). I also have not been famous for my celibacy. I might be able to get what I want, but I get what I need. You know what I mean.

I get all warm and fuzzy when I think about making a commitment to a man who is my best friend. Before you point your finger accusing me of putting too much pressure on a mate, hold off. Trust me pookie-bear, I will always have a special part of myself reserved for my gal-pals only. Consider it my healthy outlet to take the pressure off Mr. Wonderfulbuns.

Just because I don’t go around whining about my single status, and even dare to (gasp) celebrate my freedom, and the creative relationships that I do have, doesn’t mean I spurn monogamy. I simply haven’t signed up. Yet. Who knows whether I ever will. I am a woman with hopes, dreams, and a sensitive side just like anyone else.

I have, through my own unique experience, chosen to keep my life simple, my relationships unburdened, and my eye on honourable goals as a mother and professional.

Single women still suffer the stigma of either being unlovable or sluts. The reality is we are stronger than you could ever imagine, wage change for women’s rights better than anyone else, and have the freedom to learn, create and be fearless.

Trust me, if I ‘settle‘ down, it will be with a partner who is my equal. That means that I certainly won’t be settling.

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