I hope that you had a chance to catch up on the news this weekend. God help you sweetie if you’re relying solely on the newspaper, although it is terribly entertaining.Saturday evening I took in the news in my favourite chair at my favourite cafe. I suggest you pour your favourite warm beverage and enjoy the next five thoughts that I leave with you as the weekend wanes.
1) David Bowie is back with his first album since, well, since he got his teeth capped in that my-what-big-teeth-you-have-grandad way, and his face lifted. Mr. Bowie, you were beautiful, and would have aged beautifully all on your own.
2) A very ‘young’ 62-year-old female is seeking a 63-72 year old male to enjoy the finer things in life. 72? Really? How on earth did you come up with that number? Parcheesi? And by ‘young’ do you mean born late in the year, say…December? You either need dementia meds or a reality check you deluded ego-maniac. Nowhere in the advert did it say she was hoping for more meaningful characteristics in her future companion than him being ‘slim’ and ‘financially independent’. Whatever happened to nice, kind and compassionate? The human race is doomed, doomed I say!
3) A plethora of pages dedicated to what to do with the kids during March break. How about let the little buggers go outside, use their imagination, get a few scrapes and bruises and breathe fresh air? How about chill out and get to know what ‘home’ means?
4) Another movie aimed at the hearing aid set . Cloudburst is about two old lesbians. Yes, it’s great that we’ve finally woken up as a society and no longer demonize people for their sexuality/gender/curious preferences. I’m sure it’s a charming movie, but I go to the movies to escape. I don’t want to see 80-year-old lips (of any description) on anything but a lap-dog or a grandchild. We all get old. I get it. Just let me have entertainment that doesn’t knock me over the head with the sledgehammer of reality.
5) How NHL players dress when they’re not on the ice. Who. Cares? Talk about 10 inches of desperate-to-fill-the-page-junk.
Wishing you the intelligence to question what you hear, read, view and are told is the ‘news’.