Too Much Advice Not Enough Lovin’

“Advice is like castor oil, easy enough to give but dreadful uneasy to take.”
~ Josh Billings ~

It was complete synchronicity that found me seated in Nashville’s historic Grand Ole Opry.  I wasn’t supposed to be there, in fact, I was supposed to be in another city, but there I was, enjoying a show that I never expected to see.I’d heard of many of the performers, and was pretty happy to have been able to say that I saw them live, but it was one musician who blew me away with his music and lyrics.

A musician that I’d never heard of, and would likely never have heard of if I hadn’t been there that night.

Mark McGuinn came out on stage and belted out the song Mrs. Steven Rudy, and I became an instant fan.  I bought the album, and listened to it over and over.

At that particular time, my life, in every aspect was in turmoil. Everywhere I turned, I got a whole lot of unsolicited advice, and quite frankly after a while, all that advice got on my nerves.

Last night, having had a recent spat with my new boyfriend Mel (Atonin), I woke up at 3am and one of Mr.McGuinn’s lyrics popped into my head, “You can’t get too much love, but you can get too much advice.” Amen Mr. McGuinn. Amen. The lyrics are from the song, “What if They’d Don it Right”, all about people we admire for their unconventional ways.

When I was younger I weighed the advice of other’s quite heavily when making major life decisions. As I’ve come into my own, as a fabulous, strong, independent gal, I have come to realize that following my heart, asking for what  I need, and expecting adequate compensation for the many skills that I have, is way more important than what anyone else thinks.

In fact, unless I ask for it, I don’t really want  your opinion. I’m betting you feel the same way, don’t you my savvy, intelligent reader?

I’m tired of my married friends telling me how much better off I am single. What I want to say is, “Yah, really, Ms.My-Hubby-Pays-Half-the-Bills-and-I Wake-Up-to-a-Warm-Body-and-Someone-to-Celebrate-Daily-Victories-With, tell me more about how you live vicariously through the glory of my independence.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s no different from my-I’d-rather-not-deal-with-a-useless-man’s-emotional-baggage-and-mommy-issues-self and advising my friends to leave their lying, cheating, useless husbands.

We’re not friends because of the advice we give. We’re friends because of the love we give. So, my advice is….did I just say that?

Anyway, I recommend we wonderful women lean toward the listening and loving when supporting our fabulous friends, and leave the annoying advice giving and attempts at fixing to the men who vex us so much.

Again, ’tis the season. Not the season for material giving or advice. ‘Tis the season for making time for friends and listening. One more recommendation….try to channel your carefree youth. Reminisce and laugh, or better yet, get up to the mischief that makes you so darn irresistable.

 

 

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