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Chain LinkedIn

My inbox has been a veritable menagerie this week thanks to a popular professional networking website’s ability to access my personal email and contact list.

Not only has it succeeded in mailing out an invitation to “Join Me”, to everyone on my contact list, it has rather insidiously emailed contacts that I have removed from my contact list. Including those pesky fellas who just didn’t make the grade. Even one of my most recent ex-boyfriends  responded to the automatically generated email within minutes asking if I had intended to email the invitation.

“Of course not you tool”, was the automatic reaction in  my head. Instead, I emailed a brief apology, and carried on with the sinking feeling that this was just the beginning of something awful. Kinda like Scrooge after his visit from the first ghost on Christmas eve.  I knew that was the first of many ghosts of the past to visit me.

This was going to get ugly. Fabulous. Just what a gal needs.

I can’t express my delight at what a wonderful feeling it is to receive reciprocal emails from those once-upon-a-time-potential-partners. Likely because it is not a delight.Not at all. It certainly has not been a delight when I see that they have accepted the invitation to “Join Me” in my professional network, or emailed me a friendly, “Hey, how are you? Want to get together sometime?”

Ah, no.

 I can’t think of anything worse. Perhaps someone removing the hair from my girly bits with a blow torch could be issued to substitute the pain which the networking site has inflicted.

It’s not just because I don’t want to talk to those guys who provided me with such, um, ….interesting experiences, but because I really, really don’t want anything to do with them at all.

Like my ex’s for example. If I wanted to contact them, I could have called, emailed or showed up on their doorsteps. Meat will have time to rot off the bone before I ever consider contacting any of them. So, I’m kinda pissed off that this networking site took the liberty to do that for me, – especially since I have deleted ALL of their contact  information.

That goes for the other men on the roster of “Didn’t Quite Make The Grade”.

On the other hand, I have re-connected with men whom I had great, fun, rollicking friendships with. But the key word is ‘had’. We had a fun, friendly relationship, not a professional one. 

A few of the people rather confused by the automatically generated invitation include my son’s previous nanny, my minister, my sifu at the temple, a slew of men I dated, friends, dragonboat teammates and their spouses, my running partners from last summer,relatives I haven’t spoken to in forever and anywhere I’ve ever applied for a job or placed on order on-line. Oh the joy!

So, if you’re reading this and you got a “Join Me” email from a professional networking site, my sincere apologies. I did not mean to barge into the professional lives of the parent’s of my child’s sports teams, my dragonboating teammates, douche-bag ex-boyfriends, one-off hot dates,  relatives or the SPCA.

2 thoughts on “Chain LinkedIn

    1. Oh, I’m very aware now! As much of a pain in the rear it’s been, it’s brought back lots of funny memories, and made me laugh too. Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed the post!

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