There are a number of burning questions I have that I dare not ask the average person. Sure to stimulate heated, highly intellectual debate I pose them here for you my dear readers, so you may ponder them. After thoughtful consideration, perhaps you could present them for discussion.
1) How do Mermaid’s go to the bathroom?
2) Does anyone really cut someone’s hair into a mullet on purpose?
3) Would having bedbugs actually improve the quality of nooky since there would be more wiggling around?
4) When exactly did we reach the tipping point in North America of women getting too lazy to paint their own toenails?
5)Is there anything more luxurious feeling than skinny dipping with your man?
6) 1980’s fashion – parachute pants and mesh tops for men; Should this have triggered social action regarding a significant increase in recreational, chemical drug use?
7) Men are reactive rather than proactive with regard to romantic gestures – is this shrewd economics or ignorance?
8) Why do men of a certain age snore in that freaky way that makes you think they’ve stopped breathing and then all of a sudden let out a blast of air from their mouth that’s kind of like a fart?
9) How come water-beds went out of vogue?
10) Why do we announce our impending orgasms?
I’ve done my best to enhance the quality of your conversation this weekend. I expect a full report in my inbox by Monday morning.